I'd like to preface this story by stating that I was very drunk while texting this. I'm both sorry and not sorry.
Sister: "I'm trying to explain to mike why everyone hates Tennessee. He isn't getting it"
Will: "Imagine someone you know who isn't quite retarded to the point where they are special needs but is incredibly stupid. And this person is very insecure about it so, they run around constantly swinging their dick around expecting everyone to suck it because they think they're the best, even though time and time again, they've proven that they're a limp dick worthless piece of shit. They butt-in while you and your friends are trying to have a real conversation and start singing stupid f---ing rocky top" at the top of their lungs, even though you've told them to shut the f--- up and no one likes that annoying song. Oh yea, and all he wears is orange, all the time, even when it's not appropriate. You pray you don't see him at weddings and funerals because he'd ruin the whole thing with his inbred accent, dumb and dumber orange tux, and stupid hillbilly dancing. You don't know exactly who invited him but, if you find out, you'll probably punch them right in the scrotum. That's why everyone hates Tennessee"
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